Ahh....it looks as though a certain someone is still reading this blog.

And in answer to the question why don't I just let go and move on....well, it hasn't been as easy for me as it has been for him. Especially when I get the I told you so's when I'm not even asking advice.

I am moving on with my life, just not as quickly or convenient as he would like. I held out hope for us and now, I'm in an anger phase, a phase where I would LOVE to get some revenge and make him feel like I feel. And trust me I COULD, but I'm bigger than that and I won't.

I am at a point where I feel strange even trying to start something with another man when I'm still in love with someone else. I am trying, I have had offers....Numerous in fact. And one day I will take up one of those offers, for right now. I vent....I vent because I care and I hurt, not because I can't move on. And what better place to do that than your blog.

I am giving him all the space he desires, I don't talk, don't call, don't email him. Even though I'd like to. I have told a total of 5 people about what he's done, and they have told no one. I could shout it out loud and let everyone know, but I don't. I've even defended him when people tell me he's an asshole, because I know that's not true. I never say anything bad about his new girlfriend (well unless in the privacy of my own home....without people from work and that's just my anger talking not my actual opinion). I'm trying to be adult about the whole ordeal when in reality I could be a spiteful little bitch about it and make his and her life a living hell....but like I said I'm bigger than that. If he doesn't like the fact I can't change my feelings overnight.....than I'm sorry, but TOUGH!!

I know one day I'll be able to be his friend, just right now I have to get through this phase. I am moving on I'll tell you that, just one day at a time. Everyday I realize another reason I'm kinda glad were not a couple anymore ... like the insane amount of jealously he has with the person he's with. It's just a slower process for me. I was, after all, the dumpee not the dumper.

Dayne will not be the last man I'll ever have the pleasure to love. He was just the first I loved as much as I did.