What I like to call "North Shoreitis"

For those of you privileged enough to live in the Chicagoland area, you are well aware of what the North Shore is. For those of you who are not, let me put you into perspective for you. You know that area of your surroundings that the houses cost no less then a million, the women run around in yoga pants complaining, every child is raised by a nanny, and no one drives less than a Lexus. That my friends is where I work.

Land of the wealthy and privileged, do not for a second try and tell them what to do, or when, they have their own clocks for they are far too important to deal with your schedule. You are expected to go by theirs.

Now I work in a dental office as their office manager, basically this means everything my boss (the dentist) does not want to do. Answer the phones, schedule patients, billing, insurance, babysit his kid, run errands whatever the man decides to make me do that week so he can go golfing. In this position I have become more than capable of dealing with those people who either:

1. Want to blame everything that goes wrong in their life on me. i.e. traffic, forgotten appointment, their bill, or even better their poor dental hygiene.

2. Even though they make 1.8 million dollars a year, they still want everything for free.

3. Just plain like to scream.

Now one thing I should point out to you, you can definitely get on my good side by asking nicely. I will go out of my way for my patients that are sweet and kind. I've developed a very thick 'bullshit' skin though so your bitchiness won't work on me. You'd me more inclined to hear me say something along the lines of "Looks like some bored housewife needs a serious pounding" than you would hear me squeeze you in for an appointment.

The last few days have been challenging in my world to say the least.

Let's talk how my week started shall we?

Monday: Cody has said appointment at noon. Cody is an 11 year old child who's parents consistently show up 15 minutes or more late for an appointment. Cody doesn't show up. Now mind you I called and left a reminder message AND gave them an appointment card before leaving. Now Doc is absolutely the worst to deal with when an appointment doesn't show. (again, he's from the North Shore, this must be my fault) Oh well, looks like that patient is going to be charged that $50 missed appointment fee.

Tuesday: Cody's here. At 12:25. Officially 24 hours and 25 minutes past his appointment. His mother sent him in by himself as usual. I already have a patient booked and in the chair. He runs out to get his Mom, Diane, to which she storms in...here's where it gets interesting.....

First I explain they have arrived for the appointment on the wrong day. To which she screams at me that I am wrong. Even though the person who actually was scheduled booked her appointment almost 2 months prior.

Second I explain that even if her appointment WAS today, I wouldn't be able to see them because they are 25 minutes late. To which her reply was she drove as fast as she could to get there from the school.

Now I'm trying to get out of her when would be best to rebook her appointment...she's still screaming obscenities regarding this is taking out of her schedule and time she can not keep coming to the dentist (her kid has 9 cavities I mind you they need to be taken care of) how I should just see them anyway...blah blah blah. I'm trying to talk her off a ledge here and the women proceeds to then haul back and ... ready for it? ...

THROW HER KEYS AT ME!

Now, I don't think I've seen such a tantrum since my 2 year old niece wanted to wash her hands so badly at the Olive Garden. I'm waiting for this women to throw herself on the floor and start kicking her feet wildly. Thankfully...I just called her behavior uncalled for, booked her an appointment for Thursday, and pointed toward the door.

(FYI, had she had been nicer I would have told her she could wait a 1/2 hour and we'd see them in the cancellation spot I had. But she wasn't so I didn't)

This set the tone for the rest of the day...nothing but complaint after yelling after blame thrown..and we lost 4 patients due to the doctors sometimes caviler behavior.

Wednesday: Seriously?! I don't even know where this day went it was so busy with paper work, insurance nonsense, and pre-treats GALORE! It was a plethora of paperwork.

Thursday: Which is by far my longest day of the week. Not only do I work from 8am till 7pm but the day slowly drags on for an eternity since it is my "Friday". This Thursday though it's like someone threw a stick in the spokes of my ten speed.

EVERY SINGLE PATIENT showed up late. And not just a few minutes. Any where from 10 to 25 minutes late. (with the exception of our last patient who kindly showed up 15 minutes early, praise the lord)

First of all one of these wonderful patients was Cody....you remember Cody right? His mom threw keys at me on Tuesday? Well Cody comes in, alone 25 minutes late. Now I feel bad for the kid, he really needs this work done and his grandfather just dropped him off as if he were 22 not 11. We end up seeing him but left several messages today regarding the need for Diane to call us and address this issue. (These calls have not been returned as of yet)

Second, I don't know if you know or realize this, but it is NOT, I'll repeat that, N-O-T ok to show up at any medical health facility late. Not even 5 minutes. It's especially not ok to do this if you don't even call to say, there's an accident, or my grandma just fell down the stairs and broke a hip.

Medical/Dental practices are normally very tightly booked. Which means, we usually have about 3 to 5 minutes in between patients to reset a room. If you show up early, chances are we'll be able to see you early. If you show up late, chances are you'll be rescheduling because we have another appointment booked right behind yours. Most offices try to run smoothly and on time. If you go to the doctor and end up waiting for 10 to 20 minutes, trust me don't blame the doctor. Blame the asshole that showed up late 3 appointments before you and knocked everyone off schedule. 90% of the time that's the case.

We make mistake in the field, we're not perfect, but neither are you. If I make a mistake, I'll apologize extensively. If someone in the North Shore make one, they'll find every excuse to make it mine. (including forging appointment cards in their favor...oh yes I've seen it, like I don't know my own handwriting)

So it's 6:38pm, I'm been attempting to write this since 11am but keep getting interrupted but a steady stream of late, irate, and self entitled North Shorians. Ah...fuck it...I'm going home, a beer awaits my rough week.