Since something happens to me every weekend in Janurary it seems....

First off...It snowed people! Not just a little but like 2 feet in 24 hours. I'm not big on the cold in the first place, but the cold AND the freakin' snow....PASS! Needless to say the drive home on Friday night from work, NOT FUN! And took almost 2 hours.

Saturday morning I was up bright and early to make the trek back to work pondering on why I didn't just sleep in the restaurant. I then phone pops and let him know 1...I made it to work in one piece and 2...mom's sicker than she thinks.

Turns out...I'M RIGHT. Dad get's home, puts mom in the car practically kicking and screaming the whole time that she didnt want to go. Skip ahead a few hours and I'm getting the call at work mom's having an emergency appendectimy. So next time folks you think it's the flu....but it feels 5 times worse....GO TO THE DOCTOR!

Skip ahead a week till yesterday and turns out mom's pathology report comes back telling her that there was a cyst on her appendix. And that cyst ladies and gentlemen....CANCEROUS. The surgeon seems to think they got it when they removed the appendix, but I'm still worried. She goes to her regular doctor on Thursday....maybe then....after the 2nd doctor opinion. I'll feel better.

I'm losing my damn mind.

No joke people I'm losing it. So far 2005 has gotten off to a REALLY nasty start. It starts with the Brit breaking my heart ... then we move on to the actual first week of Januray where I'm a crazy emotional basket case who couldn't even go one frickin day without talking to or hearing the voice of the Brit...so what happens the second week you ask. Well, I was thinking it wasn't going to be too bad....damn was I wrong.

I started out the week not too bad, then I just went to straight up pissed when I found out the Englishman was going on a snowmobling trip....NICE. Well, slowly but surely I got over that once he admitted to being insensative about it. So I figured I'd keep myself busy all weekend.

I worked Friday night till after 10, went home slept...woke up at 6am to go back to the day job Saturday morning then to Bennigan's at 10:30 to open the bar and work till 7:30pm when I finally got to go home!! Well, I went out with Holly (our plans we made last week) and were joined by quite a few other people for drinks later. Well about the time someone told me I was jealous of Holly cause she was much prettier then I...I knew it was time to go. Fortunely the whole night I'd been getting calls from friends from the city to try and get me to come downtown. Origianlly I didn't want to go..but after that little kick in the face by an unmentioned partier...I decided to get the hell out of dodge.

Well, should've just stayed HOME that night....the night was not all that...just a few friends standing around talking and catching up with LOUD music playing in the background. Well, club closes....everyone's being kicked to the crub, 'cept us, cause we "know people". Well I plant my happy ass on stage to wait for friends to finsih up so we could all hightail it out of there together. Then nature calls. and the damn bathrooms is on the thrid floor. I set my stuff down by a friend, to make the 3 story trek...gone 5 minutes TOPS...come back, NO STUFF!!

NO JOKE PEOPLE! There's maybe like 30 people in the whole damn place and someone took my shit, that was sitting RIGHT next to my friend. Fuckers....so as of this moment, I have no drivers licesne, no ss card, no credit card, shit I don't even have a blockbuster card....I'm a loser.

Brace yourselves ladies and gentlemen....I'm back.

I've taken a small break from the blogging. I had a lot going on with the holidays, my vacation, my personal life, and work. But now I'm finally ready to talk again.

First of all Christmas was a success. Dayne liked his gifts, the kids were ecstatic to get a 13' trampoline and Dayne and I whipped my families ass in Scene It the game. New Year's a lot less exciting. Dayne and I stayed in ordered pizza got some brews and played video games. My ten days off work were relaxing...well that is till the end.

On the very last day of my vacation is when the bomb hit people. For those of you who don't know yet...Dayne broke up with me. Now I'm sure your as shocked as I was with the news. Well, actually I was down right hysterically devastated and thought my whole world had come to an end. I've never felt so alone as I did at that moment. But a week and 3 days later I'm dealing with it a lot better.

I know your asking yourself why....and as my friend Liz's boyfriends says...'What is he an idiot?!' That's not the case. I've come to start to realize, Dayne needs to straighten some things out in his life before he can be with me...or so I don't sound so conceded...anyone. We pushed our relationship to far, too fast and we killed the spark instead of letting it flourish into the fire it could've been. I'm still in the blaming myself/angry as hell stage. But I'm getting better everyday. Amazingly enough he's being so nice for someone who just crushed my heart. At first that made me mad as hell, mainly cause I wanted to be mad and hate him. But I love him too much to hate him. So, needless to say, I'm single again. Who ever said being single was fun...was wrong. I liked having someone to go snuggle with every night. I like actually having someone to call whenever for whatever.

But I'm on my own, and starting to realize that's not such a bad thing. I'm convinced that once Dayne straightens out things in his own life, and I in mine....he'll want me back. At this point though that's just wishful thinking due to the break up being so new. Who know's we could end up like Jeremy and I did...best friends. Then again I never had sex with Jeremy and I already miss making love with Dayne......OK NEW SUBJECT...I'm starting to go off in fantasy world and that's NOT GOOD!!

So I've been looking at some places to live, and it looks like I'm going back to the city. One for the affordable reasons, and too...it'll keep my mind occupied! Anything to get OUT of Wisconsin is good for me. I'm looking at a March 1st move (cross my fingers I pay off Dayne's Christmas present debt by then...) but I'm moving forward and starting a new life.....on my own.

I've come to realize I've lost a lot of my friends by simply not being around or available for the last year. And for those of you who aren't speaking to me anymore. I apologize for being an ass....then again you probably aren't reading this anyway...

The good new is, I have talked to people in the last week I haven't spoken to since even before the Englishman and I got together. Turns out I'm not the only one in break up mode....Tom and Jimmy are both newly single. Jimmy after 5 1/2 years, so I guess I can't really complain too much. That must of hurt MUCH more. Anyway, I have a shoulder to cry on at least....and maybe some strong hands to help me move....one's that won't pass out anyway! (cough...fat kid...cough, cough)

I gotta go, the day's gettin' heated...people are yelling...(what else is new)...and I gotta work! Wish me luck in the new year...Hopefully 2005 will be a good year for Dawn.

By the way....know anyone that wants to buy some furniture?