Working it OUT...or off really

I’ve been thinking a lot lately…I know, it’s dangerous, but seriously, I have done nothing about my increasing waistline. I keep saying I’m going to, but it never happens. I mean I really go all out for about 2 weeks, and then nachos come my way and I’m just all downhill from there. Who can REALLY say no to nachos?!

So … I decided since I haven’t used this blog in a while I’d start using it to help keep myself accountable. Putting it in my face is the only way to really make me think about it isn’t it?
I admit I have a lot of problems with diet and exercise. First of all, I don’t think I’m THAT much of a fatty, until I catch myself in the mirror right before jumping in the shower, then I scare myself.

Second, I LOVE food. No really, it’s my boyfriend & my best friend. It cheers me up when I’m depressed, keeps me company when I’m lonely … hell it just plain gives me something to do when I have nothing better to do. I have a theory that the foods that are the messiest are the best tasting. Nachos, chilidogs, a fat juicy burger. YUM! If they’re a possibility of staining your clothes, it’s going to be damn good! And then there’s the deep fried theory, you can’t go wrong when you deep-fry something. I even had deep fried pickles when I went to Louisiana this last time, and they were to DIE for. Nothing like completely bastardizing the cucumber.

Third, well, I’m lazy. I hear people I know actually laughing. Yes, I’m a work-a-holic that can spend 16 to 20 hours a day at work. Yes, I’m a neat freak who spends her Saturdays on ‘clean mode’ and proceeds to scare people with how badly I want things clean. BUT when it comes to my own health, I’m the laziest bitch you know. It’s sad really. When I could be out running or walking even on a beautiful day. I choose to lay with the TV on and do nothing. I think it’s because I don’t have an opportunity to do nothing a lot so therefore I find it necessary to ‘treat’ myself on the rare occasion that it comes up. Which of course means sitting on the couch all day stuffing my face. Smart huh?

Oh, and then there’s beer. I how could you not like the tasty goodness? Even though it backs on the extra calories and pounds…I still heart beer. And of course my favorites are the most fatting of all Weiss beers. Mmmm….Blue Moon…..but really….I’m pretty sick of grossing myself out. I lie in bed at night actually depressed about my weight and then during the day, I make all the wrong choices. I have to admit, I’m terrified about seeing people from my past at a wedding in September. I’m sick of being lethargic and pitiful. I want my hot skinny bod back. And damn it…I’m going to get it!

First, in March I joined Weight Watchers online to try and make me accountable for what goes in my mouth everyday. I’ll tell you one hard part…living with someone else. I may not buy the ice cream knowing I’ll eat it when I go to the store, but she might. And I’m an ice cream junkie! It’s easier to say yes when she asks me if I want something from Taco Bell than to get up and cook and who’s going to turn down a Frosty from Wendy’s on a hot day? Well, since March I haven’t really followed the WW plan. And sadly is haven’t really gained or lost more than a few pounds…and I think that was water weight. Honestly right now my goal is to break into the 170’s! And that’s been my goal for months. Sad, really sad.

Well, I made a deal with myself, I’m not going to waste my hard earned money on something I’m not going to use, instead of quitting the program, I’m getting more serious about it. Keeping a food journal and tracking EVERY point I can. This week alone I’m almost over my allotted points, I tell you I’m a pig…but I’m aware of it and am making plans for my next grocery shopping trip to prevent these problems.

Second, last Saturday night TFK(the fat kid) and the boys came over the hiznouse (yeah I said it) and drank wine for TFK’s birthday. Inevitable when TFK gets wasted, he starts talking about his weight. He was actually talking to the boys about joining a gym with him, but when I heard how cheap it was, I got to thinking….I could handle that price. Not to mention if I’m paying for it, no matter how little, I’m going. So Tuesday, I joined a gym. Now I can’t make the excuses about running outside…it’s raining, it’s too cold, it’s too hot…blah blah blah. So since TFK wants be TSSK (the somewhat skinnier kid) and he’s willing to admit he needs to be helped by having someone go with him I’m now his gym partner…mainly cause he’s scared I’ll kill him if he doesn’t show J but it’s also helping me, I need to be held accountable as well. I won’t stand someone up for anything, I’ll make excuses to myself why not to go, but that won’t fly for him…or for me anymore for that matter.

In the last 3 days, I’ve ‘jogged’ a total of 10.3 miles burned 1247calories at the gym and I actually feel pretty great. It’s only day 3 though people. I figured I’d look at it like Celebrity Fit Club. They have 100 days to bring down their weight and some of them loose as much as 50 lbs. I WANT to loose a total of 50 lbs. But with the wedding coming in 3 short months from today, I’m going to shoot for 30 lbs by then. 90 days, 30 lbs….I think it’s plausible. Really, if you look at it mathematically, it’s about .3 lbs a day. That’s feasible I think. As long as I watch my intake and really take my workouts seriously, I think I’ve got it made.

So .. by September 22, 2007, the day of my cousin Casey’s wedding I SHOULD be 30 lbs (if not more) lighter J Wish me luck! I’ll keep you posted at least once a week on my progress…if you’re reading or care anyway ….

Today June 22, 2007
Days at the gym: 3 (in a row!)
Calories burned at the gym: 1247
Miles jogged: 10.3
Weight today: 181.2 … mind you I’ll only be on the scale every 2 weeks or I’ll FREAK out
Weight to lose before the wedding: 30 lbs
Weight I WANT to lose: 50 lbs

And I would like to point out that today at lunch instead of getting a Dr. Pepper (which I do have an obsession for) I got the light lemonade….not as tasty as Dr Pepper, I mean really what can be, but WAY less calories!